The past year has been filled with simple blessings already so easily taken for granted, such as being in person with loved ones or getting on planes to see something beyond our four walls. When I compare where we are as a global society now compared to early 2021, it's night and day, and I am so grateful for what this progress has afforded me this year.
I share below the year in photos and memories, in highlights and lowlights. Scrolling through all these beautiful faces and reflecting on my experiences throughout the year is perennially joy-inducing. All these choices, the triumphs small and large, the little moments spent together - add up to a beautiful, well-lived life.
There are two strong themes that are percolating in my mind as I go into 2023. The first is home. Since moving out of my Glen Park apartment and in with my parents due to the pandemic in late 2020, I've had a lot of freedom from bills and responsibility. It's allowed me to spend the summer living in Europe, to not feel rushed upon my return to find a permanent housing solution. But some of these factors have left me feeling rootless, craving to carve out my own space and plant myself somewhere. I want a place to hang my hat in the stretches when I'm not exploring the world. Importantly, my sense of home goes beyond the physical - to me it also means community and relationships. After so much traveling this year, I want my own place to gather the things and the people that I love. I want to build home.
The second theme is surrender. With so much freedom comes copious amounts of choice - something I am so grateful to have and yet often debilitated by. Where do I go from here? What is the right path? I am learning to detach from outcome, to trust the process, to surrender. To realize there is no right, no wrong, just moving forward. I want to keep this at the forefront of my consciousness, to resist the illusion of control, and to practice flowing, trusting, and surrendering all through the year.
In 2022, I...
Reset for the new year at one of my most special spots, Xinalani yoga retreat in Puerto Vallarta, with Brittany
Took a private arial yoga class with a view of the ocean
Had an unexpected visit from Letizia, all the way from Paris for work
Reveled in group dinners, which still felt incredibly fresh "post"-COVID
Finally got up the courage to step foot in the creepy abandoned barn behind my parent's court in Vacaville (for one second) that I'd been afraid of since I was a kid
Learned and constantly repeated an extremely helpful mantra for Enneagram Ones like me: "I am good" - this helps me dissociate my intrinsic worth from productivity and perfectionism
Lost to my dad at mini golf (shocking)
Enjoyed several wine tastings with friends at my favorite spot in Napa, Laird Family Estate
Spring with James and Caroline
Fall with Preetam and Brittany
Hit the three year mark working at Zendesk
Enjoyed kiddo time in North Carolina with the Brookshires
Became very popular when I caught a butterfly
Celebrated Brittany's birthday around SF
Got reunited with my Canadian Xinalani friends when they visited Napa
Disconnected for a couple more tech shabbats (24 hours with no technology)
Celebrated Easter with the family, including grandma visiting from the Azores
Made a courageous leap and moved to Europe for three months to work remotely for the summer
Showered myself in orange and powdered sugar at King's Day in Amsterdam
Slacked (off) from this room with a view, my apartment on the Amstel overlooking the Opera House
Enjoyed Amsterdam with old and new friends
Letizia visiting from Paris
Ian and Kelsey's Europe trip just happened to coincide
Amsterdam Zendesk colleagues
Amy, an old Box contact
Got brave with going out into the world to meet new friends and experiences
My Amsterdam stoop
Caught sight of the King of the Netherlands on Liberation Day at the dock across from my apartment
Went gay bar hopping in Rembrandtplein with a Dutch duke
Immersed myself in art and architecture amidst the many renowned and also lesser-known museums in Amsterdam
Became a self-fancied international art collector, starting with my first-ever auction purchase and burgeoning expensively from there
Found home in hanging out with Italians in Amsterdam (searching out pockets of Italy when I felt lonely was a helpful tool over the summer)
Blissed out at a serendipitous Michelin meal in Giethoorn with Brittany
Soared through Amsterdam on my bike (it really is the best way to see the city) - and sometimes I didn't soar so much as strenuously pump my legs to make it over steep bridges, but long stretches along the water gazing up at canal houses made the huff worth it
Hit a low curb at an angle on my bike, in front of dozens of people, and had to jump off it to avoid falling. One passerby called out, "Nice catch!" and it was such a moment of grace and being a part of the world that I didn't even mind looking like an idiot.
Returned to the town of my soul, Bologna, enjoying the best local delicacies with old friends
Took Italian-language yoga for the first time at a retreat in Umbria with Azzurra (and a dozen other lovely people)
I got COVID during it too
Made new friends and overlapped with others while in Portugal for two months
Cousins visiting Lisbon from CA
Sam, a colleague I speak to weekly but met in person
only for the first time in Lisbon during her family vacation
Petra, another past Box colleague
And Raquel, a Zendesk one
New Brazilian girlfriends
Tried surfing for the first time and stood up on my third wave
Went to several Meetup events and Airbnb Experiences, almost always on my own, stepping way out of my comfort zone to meet new people and do unique activities (like board game nights, expat happy hours, supper clubs, local crafts, museum hangs, guided day trips, and even my first-ever bar crawl)
Captained a sailboat on Lisbon's River Tagus
Moved through frequent bouts of loneliness as I lived in places far from close friends and family for three months. This was often flipped on its head by one simple act: going outside.
Attended Amalia Rodrigues' 102nd birthday fado concert at her home-turned-museum
Swooned over countless azulejos across Lisbon
My mother's maiden name
This one calls to mind my
Portuguese grandfather, a dairy farmer
Luxuriated atop Lisbon rooftops
Went on another yoga retreat, at Alamos near Albufeira in the Algarve. I can't understate what a great option yoga retreats are for solo travelers. I had meaningful conversations with strangers and never ate alone if I didn't want to.
Experienced my first blindfolded meal and was truly amazed at the shift of senses
Took a mindfulness seminar where we were barefoot and blindfolded and walked through the property in a line, hand on the shoulder of the person in front of us, led by the facilitator. We walked over different terrains, in and out of shade, brushed along bushes, smelled lavender, had water poured over our feet. I had no idea what was coming next, and I felt positively giddy and joyful about it. I was shocked and later moved to tears at my physical response to not knowing: that I could be so pleased and eager to embrace the surprise of the unknown and trust that it would work out.
Felt kissed by the sun exploring the dazzling beaches and weaving paths of Lagos
Saw the famous Cave of Benagil and had a BBQ on a private beach in the Algarve
Basked in hugs and kisses from Azzurra's grandparents in Calabria
Enjoyed many a warm, vibrant summer night out on the town across more than one country
Learned that one does not eat hot figs directly off the tree
La maledetta mangiafichi
Celebrated mamma's 60th birthday (belatedly)
Enjoyed the beach with Azzu and Ale in Scilla, Calabria
Missed my international flight due to connection cancelations in Calabria, and lost my luggage for over a week coming home from Europe
Pulled a prank on Kasey by switching dresses with Liz halfway through her wedding
Sublet an apartment in San Francisco for the fall, situated just half a block from Golden Gate Park
Finally walked across the Golden Gate Bridge (and back!), with Cathleen
Celebrated my dad's birthday with a wine tasting at Cline Vineyards
Reveled in being reunited with old friends in the bay
Said a reluctant goodbye to my manager/work BFF, Jeff, when he left Zendesk
Endured an extreme amount of work ambiguity through the second half of the year with leadership changes, an uncertain economy, layoffs, and finally Zendesk's acquisition in November
Through it all, was supported by an excellent group of colleagues
With my friend and new manager, Jamye
Lunch with my teammate, Kim
Past and present teammates
Saying farewell to my VP, Rendi
Soaked up family time and laughs
My mom and her brother, my godfather
With Kendall, Ashley, and baby Aubree
Tickles for Dylan
Tickles for Kendall and Briella
SF visit with Daniel
Thanksgiving cuddles with Aubree
Sharing embarrassing stories over turkey
And seized the opportunity for special visits with friends and also friends' kiddos
At Pree's baby shower in anticipation of little Sahana
Meeting Federica (a Bologna flatmate's) baby Nicole
So much fun swimming, playing, and roasting marshmallows
with Rosalee in Vacaville
Meeting Jeff's new daughter, Abigail
At Rowan's first birthday party in Precita Park
Gearing up for baby Emily at Maryana's shower
(apparently this is my baby shower skirt?)
Got COVID boosted at Hardly Strictly Bluegrass Festival
Attempted to spot the Blue Angels through the fog (I swear there was fog) with Katie
Took up some new and some trusted hobbies and art projects
Shibori-dyed napkins
Beating cousins at ladder ball
Mosaic sardinhas made by me in Lisbon
One of many puzzles
My first ceramic wheel class, at Pickney Clay in SF
Was taught important lessons about releasing perfectionism and my attachment to outcome through my six-week pottery class (check out my handmade, hard-won treasures!)
Made an effort to travel without leaving San Francisco
The superb Guo Pei exhibit at the Legion of Honor
Sharing fado music (Mariza concert) with Jason and Freddy
Sunset harbor views with Katie (and Brittany!)
Atop Grandview Park, overlooking GGP and the Sunset
with Cher from Clueless
Was a lucky lady, winning the Dollar Game at Thanksgiving
Tia Diane won Game 2
Celebrated Christmas with the family
Capped off the year by slowing down for a cozy, delicious, and rainy birthday getaway in Guerneville with Brittany
Birthday morning with mom
Travel
- Puerto Vallarta, Mexico
- Half Moon Bay, CA
- Chapel Hill, NC
- Amsterdam, Keukenhof, Haarlem, Giethoorn, and Alkmaar, Netherlands
- Bologna and Umbria, Italy
- Lisbon, Baleal, Peniche, Sintra, Caparica, Carcavelos, Arrábida, and Lagos, Portugal
- Calabria, Italy
- Guerneville, CA
Live Shows
- John Mayer @Chase Center
- Stromae @Bill Graham
- Mariza @SF Jazz Miner Auditorium
- Allen Stone's Karaoke Extravaganza @Bimbo's 365 Club
- Earhustle's Nigel Poor and Earlonne Woods in conversation with Piper Kerman @SF Main Library, Koret Auditorium
- Jonathan Van Ness: Imaginary Living Room Olympian @Castro Theater
- Chris Rock & Dave Chappelle @Chase Center
- The Nutcracker @SF Ballet
Spotify Wrapped
Great new albums from a few of my favorite artists came out this year, and I was listening on repeat.
Books
This year I read 56 books and over 19,000 pages. Last year I remember feeling like my selections throughout the year were lackluster, but this time around the sun I found myself enthralled by the majority. Sometimes one book would lead me to another, like Shuggie Bain pointing me towards the economical yet affecting Small Things Like These by Claire Keegan, or The Crane Wife inspiring me to explore the eerie writings of Shirley Jackson with We Have Always Lived in the Castle and The Haunting of Hill House, the latter two perfectly timed for Halloween.
Top Fiction
- Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow by Gabrielle Zevin
- Giovanni's Room by James Baldwin
- Shuggie Bain by Douglas Stewart
- Stoner by John Williams
Top Non-fiction
- Bittersweet by Susan Cain
- Finding Your Own North Start by Martha Beck
- The Crane Wife by C.J. Hauser
- Stolen Focus by Johann Hari
Obsessions
- Ethel Cain - Her breakout album Preacher's Daughter cut right through me. "Thoroughfare" was my most-listened to song of the year, likely by a landslide.
- Poffertjes - these tiny Dutch pancakes, traditionally topped with butter and powdered sugar, made my soul swell with delight at every bite
- Voice messages - this was another saving grace while far away from friends this year. Voice messages have become such a meaningful and fun way of staying connected as well as an unexpected tool of personal reflection. Receiving one from a friend is always a treat.
- Oracle Cards - One of my Portuguese yoga instructors had this deck as part of his altar during class and I was so struck by our group's experience with it that I asked for one for Christmas. The guidance is thought-provoking and poignantly written. Below is the card I pulled on my birthday just a few days ago. Brings it all back to surrender!
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